How We Leave Things

I have been thinking about the fact that there will be several times over the next month that I am saying, "goodbye," for a while to someone. Maybe they know why, maybe they don't. Given that we cannot predict our future (no matter how much we try) we do not know for sure when and if we will see this person again. I suppose this is true always, every day, but it is ever so real when you are facing imprisonment.

Our words are so powerful. Never forget that. Everyone who cares about us is also affected by our sentence. They are going through their own stages of grief and anger and disbelief. Try as much as you can to allow them their feelings. At the same time, do not allow anyone to abuse you mentally, emotionally or physically because of the pain your impending sentence is causing them. Abuse is never okay, and you must believe that you do not deserve it.

I digressed. Ah, saying goodbye, yes, that was what I was supposed to be blogging about. Have I mentioned that I've recently been diagnosed with ADD, it's unmedicated, ha. Ah,yes, goodbyes.

I am trying to consciously make all my words count, because they could be my goodbye to someone. Tonight, I was working with my intern on our newsletter and it goes to print tomorrow. As of now, we have no further meetings planned, but one could come up, not sure. So, I told her that she gets to take more leadership next year in the newsletter because I won't be there... Blah, blah, blah. Then I told her what a pleasure it has been to work with her, that I've been noticing certain strengths (and I listed them off) and that I highly recommend she look into a master's program that I knew she'd never even heard about. I talked with her about why I think she would be a strong candidate, who to get letters of reference from, and more. I wanted this last meeting to be meaningful. Every goodbye should have meaning.

I've been thinking about the people I'm closest with in this world. I can't really plan our "goodbye" moments. They have to just happen. But I will consider my words carefully. I will tell them how much they mean to me. I will thank them for being a part of my life. Make every goodbye matter!