Why I didn't blog yesterday and am instead doing it at 3am

Yesterday was a typical day for someone with HIGH ANXIETY! Okay, I have not heard from my school yet. My boss is pushing me because she needs to get me in the system as a grad assistant before August 15th plus she can't pay me the stipend donated to me for the summer until I'm officially a student and she needs to pay me that before I'm in as a grad assistant and all these things take time to process and I HAVE NOT HEARD FROM ADMISSIONS YET.

Okay, the serenity prayer is played in my head every time I think of these things. Everything will be okay... But, but, but,... What if they think I'm a threat to the university community - me being a big ole felon and all. It's a very large University, which I was reminded of by my doctor yesterday and she said, "they are just so big, they make broad decisions and don't think about the person." Plus my boss yesterday said, "I know you, but they don't." In other words, they may actually think I am somehow a threat to the community. What?!?!?

How can I allow my head to go to all these bad places? I'm always so positive, right? Yesterday, though, I must've woken on the wrong side of the bed because my day included:

- ordering breakfast, paying for it, and then driving off without stopping at the window to pick up my food

- interrupting a meeting in my bosses office twice because I kept forgetting things I needed in order to park on campus

- allowing the car battery to die and needing a jump from campus police when I sat in the car without actually starting the ignition

I did have a fantastic doctor's appointment with a new doc though. She was so thorough and my appointment lasted about 1 1/2 hours and I was seeing someone the entire time. She wants to start me back on my migraine meds, even though I had less migraines at Carswell. It could be the difference in air pressure or something in the environment that triggers them and I have gotten a lot of headaches lately. Surprisingly, the medication was immediately approved by Medicaid even though it wasn't on their list of approved meds. I also got a tetanus shot with whooping cough as well. I couldn't remember when I'd last had the tetanus shot (how does anyone remember those things?). I guess I'll have this handy blog to remind me in the future! By the way, my arm is sore at the muscle they shot me in. Oh well, just another ache and pain.

So after the doctor's appointment I drove six miles out of the way to pick up Sporty from work (I had her car) because I absolutely knew the back way to her work (failure!). We ate dinner. Took Superdog for a walk. Had a headache. Then, I fell asleep at 7:30pm and just woke up around 3:15 am - still in my clothes from yesterday!

Yep, it was a day. I really believed that I would hear by yesterday the status of my university admission. In eight days, my grad assistantship is scheduled to start. I still have twenty days til classes are starting. So, I'm putting all my hope and energy to the universe today that we get word of my admission TODAY and that my work can start their paperwork and I'll know I'm soon to be receiving paychecks and I can register for my classes and I can go buy cool school supplies (I love school supplies!) and my life will be on this exciting new path in criminal justice!

Just a little thing to ask that is entirely outside my control to make happen. Why is my life always a suspense novel???