I Must Be Doing Alright

I reported a couple months ago that after my mandatory counseling intake, the counselor felt I was not in need of the organization's services. In the end, my PO felt I should have three sessions to ensure that was the case. My third session was today and I was asked to sign my release today from their services. Counseling complete.

It was interesting to hear what the counselor felt were the reasons I was not in need of the services. Bluntly put, "I have my sh*t together..." Most people she sees upon release struggle in employment, relationships, financials, active addictions, housing, and more. I guess this is once again the advantage of my having had 4 1/2 years to get myself into recovery and counseling before I was indicted. I had my sh*t together before I went away - at least for the most part.

Let's not be too proud, though. I have very low moments still. I just handle them very differently than I did when I thought and acted like an addict thinks and acts. Recovery allowed me to live "through" the prison experience and continue to live "through" the ups and downs of life.

I also have incredible support- an essential in anyone's life. Counseling was there for me early on when I did not know if I had any other support and when I needed far more than those who support me could give. Counseling in any form, especially my addiction counseling, gave me an opportunity to really feel heard and explore issues I had to explore with people trained to help me through the pain and fear of dealing with those issues. Sometimes, counseling is the absolute best answer!

For now, I'm glad to be released from the court ordered mandatory counseling. The selected counselor was nice enough but it felt at times as if I were teaching her about compulsive gambling, more than gaining from the session. That is certainly not wasted time. Maybe a client of hers will walk in one of my GA rooms in the future.

So, I guess I'm doing a good job of keeping it positive after just 6 months of my official release. It's starting to feel like so much longer!! I am going to where I feel heard every week tonight - at my GA meeting - where I always know I'm not alone. If ever my GA meetings or friends are not enough for me, though, I know I can always seek counseling because life is about doing the right next thing as we need to.