Getting Those Words Out of Your Head

One of the things I find so common among almost anyone who has struggled with an addiction of any type is the negative self talk. I don't think we developed it on our own. It came from others, judging us, and our believing those words. We may never tell anyone, but inside our heads we believe we are, "stupid," "ugly," "selfish," "unworthy," "a mistake," "broken," "fat," "not good enough," "retarted," "dumb," "worthless," "a failure," "useless," etc. Sure, as kids we were all called some of those names, but some of us were called them by maybe the wrong people or too many times or somehow, we just started to believe them.

I carried around many of these words with me much of my life. Even my over-achievements couldn't help me lose the words "stupid" or "unloved" from my head. They were so ingrained, that I felt like each time I had success, I was an imposter who did not deserve the success I was earning. 

These are not the only reasons people become addicts. But my self loathing certainly did not help.

I write about this because it is possible that people are throwing these kinds of words at you now, due to your crime or the fact that you will be in prison. You must remember that you are worthy of love. Do not "own" other people's opinions of you. Ever. You must find your way to understand what got you in trouble, work through the self-esteem issues you have, and build a stronger character. 

You may have done a stupid act, but that doesn't make you "stupid." You may have lost your family, but that doesn't make you "unlovable." You may have broken the law, but that doesn't make you "broken."