From Dragonfly: Another Day

I hadn't realized the stress that living with "crazy," had been causing in my life. My new room has no "crazy" and it is pretty mellow. Since I started at Carswell, I lived with 2 groups of semi-changing roommates - the ones in the bus stop and the roommates I had for the last 4 1/2 months. Well, one week in my new digs and my stress level has decreased. I'm not saying that it is totally gone (by no means), but it is better and I like my roommates. Even my bunky - who had been fairly silent to me - has opened up and we have had several good conversations. Three of us are leaving within the next 4 months and I think that puts us all in the mindset of getting home, not living here.

The tragedy of Sporty's brother, who is now on life support, has hit me very hard. Everyone is now traveling down to where he lives, so they can do their "goodbyes." As I had anticipated, the kids are having a really hard time. The docs say that there's nothing they can do - so it's going to be just a short time before he passes. It's hard to believe someone could go to the hospital with symptoms 48 hours ago and now he's leaving us. I hate that I can't be with them all - as they are part of my family now as well, they've been there for me, and they are just wonderful people. My thoughts are with them all throughout this time.

I'm struggling with the fact that my exit paperwork is still not completed. I do not understand why the process takes so long, but for months, now, we've been waiting. Until that paperwork is complete, and my case worker receives it from the medical department, no work can be done on getting me to halfway house or home. There's nothing like the feeling of powerlessness you have when all you can do is wait, and pray, hoping that you won't be one of the folks who has to "max out" to their end date because the paperwork was never sent on their behalf.

So, it's another day incarcerated. My life is not too exciting right now. I am playing Pat Sajak today, as we run a game of jeopardy with the students. I was asked to make all the questions and I'm happy to be something a little more entertaining with the students for a day. Their prize will be an extra "calculator day," because they are only authorized to use a calculator two days/week. So, be good all, and pray for Sporty's family, who is losing an angel.