Be the Captain of your own Ship

In my preparing for success in the PhD program course today, a professor spoke of how to be successful throughout grad school and rule number one was to be in control of your own destiny. No one is going to hand you anything. You have to go after what you want. Start immediately.

I suppose that's been what I've been doing since my release, and perhaps prior. It does not just apply to grad school, it applies to life. We can't just sit back and wait for life to happen to us, it's our job to make it happen for ourselves.

Sure, there's the rare instance where someone does nothing and great things just come to them, but much more often, people work hard, show motivation, and have initiative, and that's what makes things happen.

Today at my job, I watched five youth get pulled out of their tutoring session to meet with the director. They were super nervous - all high school sophomores. I knew why, but they didn't. I watched their faces as my boss started to talk, their nervousness turning to smiles. They've been selected to be put forward for potential scholarships through our university. It's only offered to sophomores involved in pre-college programs who have earned high enough GPA's in high school so far. These five youth earned their nominations and they may receive their first college scholarships before even taking their ACT's! Hard work and initiative!

I heard a story today from a friend who had to give up custody of his sons, even though he knew he was the best patent for them. The court was biased against him/men. He continued to pay for the boys well-being and was a good man to his ex-wife and sons. Two years later, his ex-wife gave him full custody. He believes this happened because he was doing everything right by everyone. Hard to do, but his ex-wife noticed and decided he would be the better parent.

Getting back in my school was all about motivation and initiative. I guess I would add the willingness to take risks and accept failure and rejection and move beyond it quickly is a plus. 

The other thing is that it is never too late to start. I've started from scratch twice in the last seven years. My friend started from scratch twice as well. We often start over after divorce, loss of job, etc. For us felons, our release is a new start. Remember that you are the captain of your own ship. If you want a new job, go after it. If you want to meet that new cute neighbor, introduce yourself. If you want to go back to school, apply. If you want to reconcile with someone, make the first call. If you want to change your life, change it. No one will do these things for you. Believe in yourself!