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Wednesday, June 26, 2013

The Notebook

It is red. Spiral bound. 120 pages. Lined, just like all my notebooks for school or for notes or for organizing. This notebook, I started yesterday.
In the top right corner, starting a couple pages in, I wrote the date and on each page after the next date between now and the end of August. There are pages blank at the end, I hope to add dates there as well. I hope to make it to the date I wrote on the top of the last page I wrote, Saturday, August 31st.

On the lines of each dated page are lists. Things to do. Things I must do to prepare to go to prison. There are so many big things, like move out of my apartment, give leave at my job, figure out my finances, etc., that they all break down into smaller tasks: figure out what furniture to sell, post items on Craig's list, rent storage locker, call capital one credit card, make appointment with supervisor, etc. 

This is what the red notebook is for. I cannot, in fact no one, can solve all their problems at once, and if we try to look at everything we must do, it is overwhelming and can become debilitating. So, plan it out. Small tasks. A couple a day. Progress each day. Goals that move me forward. 

Today included an email to a fellow GA member I met by chance over 2000 miles away from where I live who may actually be able to assist me in getting me out of my car lease. I also (with the help of a wonderful friend) packaged old school books to be shipped off - so I can make funds toward the expenses I am incurring as I prepare for prison and for my needs during incarceration. I dropped all the fall and spring courses I was scheduled to take and instead signed up for dissertation credits (something I can do as a doctoral student), so I do not lose my status as a student. I also reduced my funding for the time I am gone to only cover the tuition of the credits I am taking and no living expenses. All these will be marked out of my red notebook on 6/25. The things that I thought I would do today, but could not, I simply carry over to another day. There is no guilt for not getting everything done. We must take all that must be done just one day at a time.

One suggestion. Please put on a couple pages of your notebook (which can be any color by the way - mine was red and free) to take some time for yourself. Take a walk, take a nap, take yourself out to the movies, etc. Don't forget that YOU matter and that YOU deserve some mental preparation for prison as well.

1 comment:

  1. Purple dragonfly here, thanks for idea of notebook. Am facing legal problems with social security, bills from gambling, student loan at age 65, wanting to retire but can't, gambling addiction and crisis in family.

    ReplyDelete

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