My Morning Fog

Ever since I got sick, but especially with my medications, I wake up with a morning head fog. It used to include a headache but a great medication has helped alleviate the headaches. It takes a good hour for my head fog to work it's way clearer. It almost feels flu-like, but I'm used to it and my whole body isn't feverish or achy, its just stiff in the joints in the morning. So I usually stay in bed for a while, stretching different parts of my body, and allowing by head fog to clear. It's quite painful when I oversleep and need to get out of bed quickly. I've  actually come to enjoy my slow mornings this past year. It allows me time to think and plan my day.

I don't think prison will allow me my slow mornings. I'm not sure how accommodating a medical facility really can be. Their primary goal is still to keep order and I certainly do not want to be a trouble maker. Prison is going to be a long term test of mind over body. I will have to will myself to move and take care of myself when I am able.

My head fog seems to be part of a larger neuro issue at times. Sometimes, I have difficulty with word finding and short term memory. It is not dementia or anything like that. It's just part of this autoimmune craziness. I hope to be able to carry a notebook with me everywhere, so I can write down things I need/want to make sure I remember. I won't forget everything, obviously, but I don't want to be asked to get some things and accidentally forget the exact items I was supposed to get (I would remember like 3 or 4 of the 5 items, etc.) I didn't used to be that way. It all started this year, since my illness flair up. I can still teach or give a speech, I just have to prepare a little differently. I have to work with my new foggy head.

My hope is that my head fog will not be a problem for me in prison. It seems so crazy to be dealing with so many things at the same time, but I'm not the only one and I will get through this. One day at a time.