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Sunday, September 22, 2013

From Dragonfly: Squat and Spread 'Em

A room about 10'x10' with a small wall dividing part of it down the middle. Four inmates and one officer. Strip, squat and spread your cheeks (the lower cheeks). That is a strip search here post-visitation. My prior strip search had just an officer in the room. Today, three other inmates could see me naked, squatting, and spreading. I could see them, too. I kept my eyes on the back wall - didn't look anywhere by at the wall. I didn't want to see anyone else. I imagine no one else wanted to see me, either. What a job the C.O.'s have that they have to look at hundreds of naked butts.

The strip search was well worth it, though! I had my first visitor - my sister-in-law (SIL). SIL is the same sister-in-law that I talked about in a much earlier post. I can't remember if I gave her a pseudonym, but for now on she's SIL. She's wonderful, loving, supportive, intelligent, and interesting. She made me laugh, listened to my stories, shared her stories, and purchased me food from the vending machines. I was not super hungry - so I ate a bag of sour cream and cheddar ruffles and drank a can of orange soda. Neither can I get in here. It was great. Next time, I told her I'm trying the pizza. Ha.

I know that she had to wait a bit to come in, but I don't know how long. It did not seem to be a full house today at visitation. Maybe 40 people had visitors today. Sad, since there are over 1,600 inmates! Maybe Saturdays are not as busy as Sundays. I don't know. Most facilities have Friday and Monday visitations as well, but not here. We can have visitors from 7-3 Saturdays and Sundays only. Actually, our visitors are escorted out at 2:45pm. SIL seemed to take in the entire experience well. I think it will freak out my parents a bit if they visit, but who knows.

Interestingly, I realized that another inmate at visitation is a woman I'd read a lot about prior to getting here. She's like the "poster child" of women's prisons (that is what she called herself while we were waiting to exit). She was an attorney that refused to cooperate with the authorities about her client who was accused of being a terrorist. She held her atty-client privilege and they locked her up. She is in end-stage cancer and has months (if that) left of her life. I guess she applied for compassionate release. Her application is with D.C. right now. So many interesting stories here. I am glad her family is able to come here and spend weekends with her.

Many of my fellow inmates tell me that they asked that no one visit while they are here. They think it would be hard to say, "goodbye," and would make them even more homesick. After having my visit today, I need to disagree with this statement. I know it is hard to see people we miss, but they need the visitations as much as we do. We need to remember that our families go through the reality of our incarceration at the same time we do. For example, I talked with T.S. this morning. She is doing alright starting college, but the adjustment and expected level of studying is difficult and she really misses having me there to talk with. I miss her everyday, but I do not have the ability to talk with her everyday. So, I just try to make our conversations count. I can't wait for her to visit me in December, when she is on break, though. Then, for hours, we can talk. I can be the parent-figure I've been to her for years. I can't wait to get home and be available all the time, but our families just want us around, period. Visits make that possible.

Sporty has been trying to visit for several weeks. She must fly here. However, her visitation form has not been approved yet. In fact, just SIL's form is approved so far. It can be quite the wait to have visitation forms approved. I highly recommend NOT making any travel arrangements until visitation approval is already received. It has been over 3 weeks for several of my friends/family so far. I think anyone listed on the PSR as family can have nearly automatic approval. Others may take time. SIL is on my PSR as family and that may be why her approval came so quickly. I am certainly glad it did. For 2 1/2 hours today, we were just the sisters we are and I was not just an inmate. Nothing can be better while incarcerated!

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