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Monday, June 2, 2014

Homeward Bound


I'm going home, I'm going home, yes, yes, yes, I'm going home! At 11am I heard my name. I'd just started doing hall laps for the second time today out of pure boredom. I walk up to the bubble and I'm told, "go get your stuff." I look at her and say, "I'm going home?" "Yes, you're going home." Hurray!!!!! Tonight begins my next step closer to a 'normal' life.

I asked if I could make some phone calls - look for a ride - but what time I'm actually released is unknown. I still need to meet with my CW.

Five nights here. It's not a true HWH, for some it's rehab, others for drug court, for all it's a locked facility. I'll never know (I hope) the experiences of a true HWH. Perhaps Freckles will and that will inform us as all.

I was just called to the CW's office. I signed more forms (some that should've been signed when I arrived), went over this week's goals - no reason to leave home, except try and go to a GA meeting on Wednesday, and went over all the rules of home confinement (shared in a separate entry). My curfew is 9pm-6am, but I need advance okay to leave and do anything. I will be called on my home phone at least 3x/day, including in the middle of the night. The home phone and I will be best friends!!

I need to take a "rules test" for staying here, even though I am leaving. They need to take my photo. Then I'm allowed to call to get a ride home. I'll likely be out after dinner.

12:35pm I'm sitting in the tv room. My leg always shakes, but it's going especially crazy. I'm so happy to be going home! I should be in my room until 1pm according to the rules, but I no longer have a room. I'll be in the not so comfy chairs for the next six hours. I'm fine with that. They are certainly better than the blue benches at Carswell. I can be patient for anything now.

I had to pick up a bunch of "Request for Time Out" slips. Once pre-approved, anywhere I'd like to go, I need to pre-fill out the form and bring it with me when I go. All places outside my home will need to sign the form when I arrive and leave. Every Monday I will go over my schedule with my CW, so my week's activities will all need to be determined before the Monday.

It turns out my PO will have nothing to do with me during my home confinement. I will still do all my reporting here. There's so much the BOP is wrong on in the info they share with us. I hope my experiences help others get a feel for what to expect - or rather - expect nothing, because whatever you think is going to happen, it is rarely ever right. What they tell you will happen, is also rarely ever right.

A bird just flew into the window where I'm sitting. It fell straight to the ground. I'd check on it if I were allowed outside this building. Once home, I can sit outside, as long as my phone reaches in terms of reception. I will certainly take advantage of being able to get some fresh air.

I've warned T.S. and Sporty to be gentle with me, in terms of wanting me to catch up on a year's worth of everything right away. I said we should make a list of everything they want to show me (T.S. video blogs, pictures, movies, tv shows, new music, etc.) and we'll so a little every day. It's a little overwhelming to come back to a 'normal' life and it is certainly okay to do it with baby steps. Sleeping on a real bed, access to a refrigerator, playing with my dog, choosing my own clothes, using an oven, wearing a cute hat, playing on my iPhone, using the internet, writing directly into my blog, and communicating to anyone at anytime using a choice of mediums are things I haven't done in nearly 10 months.

Instead of seeing life as it was before I was locked up, my head is still in prison mode. I had a small sandwich bag last night and I turned and asked if anyone needed it before I threw it away. We don't throw things away in prison that can be repurposed. The good thing was that I didn't horde it in my locker (Red would be proud). Anyway, no one needed my sandwich bag and it went to the garbage.

I guess the good thing is that I certainly will have plenty of things to keep writing about for a while. I've now had this odd HWH experience, next will be a month of home confinement, then the transition to supervision. I'll be updating on new hoops I need to jump through, successes, learning points, and failures. A new chapter is beginning.

Before I finish uploading everything I've written from the last week, I need to out out a very special "thank you." Traveler has been keeping this site from literally around the world. She has responded to individual emails, made adjustments when necessary, and has truly been the Dragonfly Hazel alter ego for 10 months. While there are a lot of thank you's I owe to all the people who made my life better while I was away, this very special thank you goes to Traveler - because she really made it possible for you all to follow my adventures and for more than 40,000 hits to occur in such a short span of time. Thank you Traveler - you are officially off-duty and I will forever be grateful to you!! This pic is for you:



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