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Monday, November 3, 2014

Oldies but Goodies

Today was a good day. I spent time with friends I've barely seen since being home from Carswell. They are the few non-school friends I've had here and are truly wonderful people. Once we sit to start talking, it's like no time has passed and we can just talk for hours. I love those kinds of friends.

The amazing thing is, though, that none of us live very far away from one another. Yet, months, literally have passed since our last time together. These are two different friends that I met with separately and the truth is, I only blame myself for the failure to ensure that we are getting together. 

After all my friends did for me while I was away, all the gratitude I have for each and every one of them, how is it possible that I fail to see some of them when they live so close? How do I fail to contact those that live further away? I haven't failed keeping in touch with my mother or father, so why do I fail so many of my incredibly friends who never fail me??

By the way, my father is still hanging on there. He's in his third round of chemo & radiation. His brain tumor is still there, but has not grown. A new cancer growth is now in the bone in his hip. That's the third location. I finally have permission to travel to see him in late December. Docs are planning on doing another PET scan right around then.

Back to my failure with my friends. For the most part, I must admit that I do not hear complaints from my friends. They know that school, work, studying, etc keep me very busy. It is very true. I think it's something deeper though.

There's a part of me that knows that I'm not capable of being as good a friend as so many are to me. They have such incredible patience and compassion. I get so lost in thought and sometimes miss a whole conversation because my ADD put me completely somewhere else. I know I do what I can for my friends, but I am always amazed at the incredible kindness of those around me. It's like I'm a not as smart Sheldon, and I'm surrounded by all the Big Banf Theory friends who make my life so wonderful. At least that's how I feel sometimes :-).

I certainly am grateful to have some of the best people possible in this world to call friends. They are interesting, generous, intelligent, kind, sincere, foodies, adventurers, family-orientated, diverse, humorous, passionate, capable, creative, fun, lovely people. I've known some for over twenty years, many for over six, and a few for just a few... And some brand new folks too. Doesn't matter, I know good, when I see good.

Whether we see each other often, every couple months, every few years, or just over facebook, it's okay by me. I know that the next time we pull up a chair next to one another, it will be like no time has passed and our friendship is just as fresh. I may not be deserving of the wonderful that is you, but I am certainly not going to easily let you go!

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